GFL – Page 0018

Grouping For Looks is a page-by-page retelling of the Looking For Group saga through the lens of a mirror universe where Cale is a goateed tyrant and Richard is a holy soul trying to set him on a good path.

INT. MOUNTAIN – MECHASTONE – DAY

Pandemonium has broken out, with dozens of gnome soldiers desperate to get the upper hand on the invading group. 

A gnome drops from above on Benny’s blind spot, dagger drawn. 

Minitar Krunch swings on a rope lassoed to a elevated stalagmite and bodyslams the dropping gnome with the force of a giant hammer. 

Richard dives and catches the dispatched gnome only for the small soldier’s spilt blood, dislodged organs, and shattered bones to pour out the cracks of his dented breast plate. 

Cale, with a fistful of arrows, stabs gnome after gnome in the eye as he slaloms through their ineffective attacks. Richard races to keep pace, dislodging arrows at half Cale’s pace.

CALE
Richard! Stop that!

RICHARD
I can’t do that, Cale. 

Richard fires waves of green energy from his clawtips, bathing every gnome Cale stabbed with healing magic. The gnomes watch their wounds seal, confused. Those still impaled with arrows resume screaming. 

CALE
Go bother Krunch.

Richard turns and sees the tiny bullperson has arranged boulders above the battlefield. Krunch rears back and charges, kicking off a rockslide. 

Richard centers himself safely near the point of impact and creates gales of wind blowing everyone and everything around him back. The boulders crash down, creating a chasm between both sides. 

RICHARD
We are not your enemies!

GNOME
You can’t stop the gnome-troll alliance! We will win this war against the wanderers!

*TWANG*

Richard circles around and blasts another gust of wind in Cale’s direction. However, noise Richard hear was the evil elf shouldering his bow. 

RICHARD
You… aren’t taking advantage of having the only weapon that can cross the chasm? 

CALE
As a wanderer, I’m concerned about this coming war. We should try diplomacy!

Richard beams with delight at the first chink in Cale’s corupt moral armour. 

RICHARD
Take us to your leader!

Krunch hops on Cale’s shoulder. He looks into the quiver on the elf’s back. 

KRUNCH
You’re out of arrows.

CALE
And trolls make really good arrows. Let’s do this the redeemer’s way until we get near the troll camp armoury. 

Richard completely misses Cale and Krunch’s devious grins as he saunters behind the gnome soldier.

GFL Archives

Original: LFG Page 18

First Grouping For Looks: GFL 001

Previous Grouping For Looks: GFL 017